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Author: Peter Gilchrist Read Time: 3 mins  A bunch of middle-aged guys and self-proclaimed “Goatbusters” (a former F3 Blue Ridge Relay team name that referenced BRR’s toughest segments, dubbed “mountain goats”) plan a group adventure every year. It’s designed to be challenging, full of fellowship, and proudly CSAUP (aka: Completely Stupid And Utterly Pointless). Doing something difficult together, gives us that shared pain … and something to reminisce about until we do the next one. Rim-to-Rim-to-Rim of the Grand Canyon, Presidential Traverse in New England, Four Pass Loop in Colorado and the Grand Teton Loop in Wyoming have all been crossed off the list. This year we hit Utah’s Zion National Park and it did not disappoint. When we touched down in Las Vegas in early Oct, the temperature was a sticky 104 degrees – exactly what you want to see when preparing to run/hike 40ish miles in a day. Luckily, what happens in Vegas stays in Vegas, and the temps in Springdale, Utah were a bit more manageable. The next morning, we visited Angels Landing. This had been on the itinerary for months. Fortunately our group was able to secure a few last chance lottery permits which covered our group of 12. After parking, taking a shuttle bus, and hiking up 2.5 miles up a steep trail (1,700+ ft of elevation gain), we made it to the official start – and somehow, we were early? We had to wait until our designated and permitted launch time, and the three female park rangers stood guard at the trailhead, checking lottery acceptances and IDs like bouncers at an exclusive night club. We tried to sweet-talk our way onto the trail early, but the rangers weren’t having it … They were seasoned vets.
Once we got on the trail, I understood the ranger's need for structure: there was only one-way up and it was the same, one-way down. 75% of the time, you’re holding onto chains bolted into the rock for dear life. On the way up, we heard a mention that at least one person dies on this trail each year. Not exactly what you want to hear while shimmying up a rockface with sweaty hands grasping an aging chain. We did see a couple get busted for sneaking onto the trail – the park rangers questioned them as they came off; unsatisfied with their answers, they took pictures of the couple and radioed down to the bottom of the trail, where they were told to pay their $500 fine! The couple was later seen walking down the trail in different clothes – trying to disguise themselves to avoid punishment. No idea how that worked out but I assume the experienced rangers have seen that trick many times before.  The Author, Peter Gilchrist, with the HPM Adventure Flag The next day, 12 Goat Busters launched from Lee’s Pass in Zion National Park for a (really long) trail run. It was an early 4:30 a.m. start (which meant a 2:30 a.m. wake up), but the group took advantage of the cooler morning temps and ran much of the early parts of the trail, which included a fair amount of downhill running. We were lucky enough to have some support from a local friend of a friend, who supplied us with food and drinks when the trail crossed a dirt road about 14 miles in. This was a big advantage that allowed us to refuel so we didn’t have to carry all of our food/water for the full day. The day got hotter quickly once the sun came up, and the middle part of the trail brought some additional challenges. To be fair, we were warned about long portions of the trail involving deep sand, but we weren’t sure what to believe: some told us it was only a couple miles while others said it could be as much as 6-8. I’m not sure how many miles of deep sand we actually endured – one mile felt like 10 – and brought back strong beach trip memories of dragging folding chairs, a cooler, and boogie boards to the ocean’s edge. Keeping the sand out of your shoes was impossible. A few us got so fed up, we found some Duct Tape from our support vehicle and covered our shoes, which now looked like a very drunk person wrapped a Christmas present. It only lasted a few miles before it completely ripped off, but it was briefly effective!  A quick break in the action to soak up the views, and take more salt pills The trail had it all: sometimes you felt like you were in a sprawling valley surrounded by steep rock walls, other times you were in a wooded forest, or climbing up or down large boulders. The one thing it did not have: wildlife. I don’t think we saw a single sign of life – not even a squirrel. Not sure what I was expecting, but the over/under for wildlife was definitely above 0. The group started to split up mid-way through the trail. Two of us out front weren’t paying attention, and missed a turn for the second water drop at mile 24. We didn’t realize it until nearly two miles later, forcing us to backtrack another two miles (which tacked on four miles to our end-of-day total). But, once we got there, we shot gunned two Cokes and a Gatorade – life-changing and much needed hydration at this stage – making it totally worth it.
Still, getting lost and adding extra miles to the trail wasn’t all that bad. One member of our group, who was fairly new to doing CSAUP events like this had it worse. Unsure about how to fuel for an all-day adventure like this, he asked another person in the group how many salt pills he should consume. I’m not exactly sure if he was given some bad advice or just misunderstood the dosage, but he took about 5x more than anyone ever should. We all quickly found out what happens when you overdose on salt pills – you end up vomiting … a lot. But, regardless, he made it to the finish and obviously earned the nickname “Salt Pill.” In total, the group covered about 38 miles (or 42 for us that got lost) and more than 5,500 feet of elevation gain in about 12 hours. We celebrated with a ridiculous amount of pizza and beer, before heading to Vegas the next day to recover. If you were at the MGM Lazy River that next day, I apologize.  Sandy Beach Vibes from The Goatbusters  Journal - CSAUP On The Zion TraverseComments are closed.
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